My heart has been broken and mended a number of times in response to painful circumstances, felt betrayal, witnessing social injustices but never more than in the last two years of lockdowns and other worldwide life-altering medical and political policies that have frightened many, harmed many, and in a few instances inspired some to rise to new heights of integrity and compassion.
It is a challenge to be NOT the VICTIMS of life but the IMPARTIAL WITNESSES of life’s events. This awareness can open the door to WINNING at the GAME of LIFE.
In recent years, I have been enriched by participating in social media IFS groups (Internal Family Systems), EFT groups (Emotionally Focused Therapy) and Trauma Recovery groups. They have been nourishing and inspiring, personally and professionally. In this short missive, I will share my own integration of all that I have gained from participating in these forums, reading the works of reliable spiritual teachers and my own observations of daily life.
My major takeaway from recent months is that it is imperative to open to an embodied paradigm shift, a shift to knowing we can be in charge of our circumstances rather than succumbing to defeat when we feel temporarily overwhelmed. The shift I am referring to is a shift in thinking from: “I was born under a shitty star” to: “We live in a USER-FRIENDLY UNIVERSE.”
Scientists and Metaphysicians are now in agreement that thought is material substance. Thought is creative. When we think we will be rejected, hurt, overlooked, betrayed, fooled, we attract more of each of those feared outcomes. We certainly need to face and express our hurt, resentment, grief, shame, guilt, rather than sweeping them under the rug or bottling them up. However, we must assure that they do not take root, thereby building a monument to a mistake. When we think we are loveable, worthy of respect, good enough, smart enough, lucky enough we change the circumstances of our lives to match and reflect those more freeing and empowering commands.
If we want FREEDOM we must be bold and brave enough to think thoughts compatible with freedom, feel emotions that are consistent with following our heart, our own True North. This takes courage, confidence and trust in intuition.
Support is also a key contributor to winning at the game of life., both receiving and giving support. This requires clarity and discernment in choosing who to turn to. This could require distancing from those who are critical, judgmental, or toxic, depleting, and/or discouraging. We must seek encouraging mentors be they poets, musicians, writers, friends, psychologists or spiritual teachers. We must encourage ourselves as well as seek support and encouragement from others.
If I am not for myself, who will be for me?
If I am only for myself, what am I?
~ The Talmud
To survive tough times, we must know we are not alone even when we feel unloved, defeated, helpless, disconnected and unimportant. There is a Spirit, Creator that keeps the planets, stars, galaxies in order and that is present if we will allow ourselves to ask for and receive solace and guidance from this source which is not external but within us.
Freedom from the past, freedom from the known requires mindful living, meditation, self-care, self-love and an awareness of the unity and kinship of all life. It may begin with time in nature where we experience a calming stillness, or in a relationship with a loved pet or moments of solitude very different from moments of withdrawal and isolation.
The resilient never give up. The resilient forge ahead. The resilient learn from past errors, the resilient take calculated risks, then the user-friendly universe rushes in to introduce expected and unexpected surprises, “miracles” that are our new just desserts. Be Resilient. Be one of the winners. Reach for success and fulfillment in every area of your life.