To those of you who have hesitated to take the first step in the journey to wholeness, to those of you who hit the pause button in that journey, to those of you who have become overwhelmed by the tasks of everyday living, I invite you to a three hour coaching webinar:
- Date: Saturday, July 29th
- 10:00 am – 1:00 pm PST
By participating in this webinar, expect to:
- Deepen your understanding of the workings and relationship of the conscious and subconscious to reclaim your agency and power.
- Learn to regulate the nervous system to stay calm or, if emotionally triggered, regain composure quickly.
- Discover how to attract respectful treatment, improved living/working conditions, and facilitate changes in external circumstances that impact well-being.
- Increase self-acceptance, confidence, creativity and the joy in living authentically.
Dare to Dream BIG and dare to have the dream come true.
The webinar will be recorded and available for a week for those whose schedule will not permit attending on July 29th.
I hope you are all enjoying the fresh flowers, flowering trees, and all that is new all around us. I would like to share a few words of wisdom from mentors who have inspired me.
“There is only one step, the first step, then the whole circus is over.”
~ J. Krishamurti, public discussion (Saanen August 9th, 1966)
“You can discover more about a person in one hour of play than in a year of conversation.”
“Be wise and definite about your health. Don’t let anything or anyone interfere. Be awake. Be a flame.”
~ J. Krishnamurti, letters to a friend
“When you are angry, you are going to make the best speech you will ever regret.”
~ William Ury
“Anger is a punishment we inflict upon ourselves for the mistakes made by another.”
“The subconscious mind is like a tape player. Until you change the tape, it will not change.”
~ Bruce Lipton
“The quieter you become the more you are able to hear.”
“Worry is the interest paid in advance on a debt you may never owe.”
In a world where violence, conflict, poverty and divisiveness are on the increase, it can seem an overwhelming challenge to live peacefully within one’s family, work environment and one’s community. More people than ever are finding it difficult to face loneliness, isolation, anxiety, depression, felt betrayal, insecurity and despair. It is no small task to remain healthy, physically and mentally, in conditions that are becoming more authoritarian, divisive and destructive to individual and collective freedom. The current crisis with inflation worldwide and climate change heighten the urgency of individual and social change.
It has been my privilege to have witnessed the small steps and occasional gigantic leaps forward of many of you committed to being authentic in an inauthentic world, to walk placidly in the midst of needless noise, chaos, and increased financial pressures all the while recovering from traumatic life events, recent or long past, that lead to needless suffering.
It is love alone that leads to right action.
What brings order in the world is to love
and to let love do what it will.
~ J. Krishnamurti
As this year comes to an end, let us remember we are not our conditioning, we are not our trauma, we are not our attachment wounds, we are not our diseases and illnesses, we are not our losses. We are, if we choose to remember and claim it, channels for creative expression.
REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE IN TRUTH.
THIS can be the game changer.
In recent months, I have immersed myself in continuing studies in psychology and spirituality. I pondered the events on the world stage and the many pandemics of fear, substance abuse, increased violence, physical, emotional and mental dis-ease, climate deterioration, divisiveness and isolation.
You must understand the whole of life,
not just one little part of it.
That is why you must read, look at the skies
That is why you must sing and dance, and write
poems, and suffer, (to overcome and end suffering)
and understand, for all that is life.
~ Jiddu Krishnamurti
In these seemingly dark times, when many challenges seem overwhelming, it is more necessary than ever to focus on solutions, not problems. We must be the ones to dispel the darkness, turn on the caring within to dispel the indifference or ruthlessness we sometimes observe in our outer circumstances. While this may seem no small task, it is the task before us. It is what we are called to do individually and collectively to recover from personal and collective trauma and become transformative agents of personal and social change.
Today is a new day. A day like no other day. Today is a day of transformation, a day for a quantum leap in joy and fulfillment. Today is a day to remember. Today is a day to celebrate provided we are open to our intuition and imagination which we liberate to run wild. Today is a day to follow leads that spring from intuition, a hunch we don’t dare overlook, or something we see or hear. a message in something we read, a person we encounter. We must ask for leads, recognize them when they arrive, and act upon them.
My heart has been broken and mended a number of times in response to painful circumstances, felt betrayal, witnessing social injustices but never more than in the last two years of lockdowns and other worldwide life-altering medical and political policies that have frightened many, harmed many, and in a few instances inspired some to rise to new heights of integrity and compassion.
It is a challenge to be NOT the VICTIMS of life but the IMPARTIAL WITNESSES of life’s events. This awareness can open the door to WINNING at the GAME of LIFE.
In recent years, I have been enriched by participating in social media IFS groups (Internal Family Systems), EFT groups (Emotionally Focused Therapy) and Trauma Recovery groups. They have been nourishing and inspiring, personally and professionally. In this short missive, I will share my own integration of all that I have gained from participating in these forums, reading the works of reliable spiritual teachers and my own observations of daily life.
True love is an inside job. We cannot look to another to love us when we feel unworthy of love. If they love us, we will not receive it because we have erected barriers. We will push that love away, discount it and attract those who use and abuse us.
A client I once saw wrote a song with the following words:
I know that I must be loving me
To let another person get close to me.
My self-loving is setting me free and
Making me the person I am meant to be.
What is true love? Love is a creative energy that flows from the heart, not from the
mind. It is what powers all growth and discovery. It is what heals and empowers. It is
that which sets us free and brings us joy.
We are challenged this year to find our JOY and stay in our Joy alone or together with those we love at a time of the year when so many have become accustomed to celebrating the return of the light, literal and symbolic.
It is urgent to reclaim our inner authority and let no lockdowns or fear-mongering messages destroy our capacity for JOY, love, connectedness and FREEDOM. Now is the moment to be creative, resilient and resourceful in celebrating LIFE. The natural world continues to offer inspiring sunrises, sunsets, mountain and ocean views, flowers and trees in abundance, magnificent birds. Music, dance, journaling, exercise, reading are all outlets within our reach. Masks are not mandated on Zoom, FaceTime or Skype.
Trauma is the experience of fear in the face of helplessness. ~ Peter Levine
Many couples report feeling traumatized, anxious, depressed and/or frustrated when conflict, unclear communication, financial stress, toxic family relations, work stress or other factors produce a rupture to a previously close bond.
The dismay and felt betrayal at misunderstandings and unexpected outbursts can be intense. In addition to being painful in themselves, these ruptures may trigger memories of neglect, abandonment or abuse often going back to early childhood when we were at our most vulnerable. Sometimes unresolved trauma from a past intimate adult relationship plays a role as well.
The challenge is always to develop and implement the skills to be allies in healing and recovering from past or current trauma as quickly and completely as possible. The recent changes in global circumstances due to lockdowns, sheltering in place, working in isolation or losing work altogether have raised the baseline of stress and reduced the window of tolerance for such ruptures. More than ever couples need the calming effect of a secure and reliable bond with their partner.